HOW YOU KNOW

You know you always hear ,you will just know when you have found the woman you love. You always sit around your dad or mom and ask how did you know you wanted to spend the rest of your life with mom or dad. They always reply you just know. Well I have the answer for everyone's question. It's when you are so stressed that you are breaking apart like a ticking time bomb and you just blow up over nothing, or you just can't seem to figure out what is wrong with you and you get irritated over something your other has done, and then out of the blue after the argument and you both are reconciling she says to you, I knew that was bothering you from the begining. Then you know that she truly loves you and knows you better than you know yourself. You always know what that person is going through, and you know that person you want to spend the rest of your life with in and out.

Sara has been with me and put up with the distance, the long shifts, the odd hours, the grumpiness when I just wake up and everything that comes with being with a man, much less a cop. I must say she is in it for the long haul and I would not wanna wait for any other woman at the end of that aisle. I can't wait to lift that veil and kiss my bride and finally say that she is my wife. I love the fact that she knows me and my ways. That she is willing to be by my side no matter what. She even gets mad at my job sometimes when i don't. She is truly my blessing from GOD and I thank him for her everyday. She is my world, my everything and I may not be perfect and I may not be so giving sometimes but I want her to know that she makes me so weak sometimes I can't stand, she makes me feel frail when I try to be tough, she makes me smile when I try to have a poker face, and she makes my world complete with a simple hello. She is my future wife, the mother of my children, and the only thing in this world that makes any sense sometimes. I LOVE YOU BABY!

relizing your potential

Ever walked into a funeral and dreaded everything u were going to experience that day. U just had no idea how much pain you are experiencing until you reach those big glass doors at the entrance. I think the emotion comes from deep down, it has to do with what lies behind the door,a family who loves you so much. The fact that your family is waiting to hold you and tell you it is going to be ok. A family that will be by your side holding your side feeling the exact same thing you are. As you walk in people greet you and hug you and give you their condolences and then you see your loved one looking good in their best suit but yet they do not look quite the way you remember them. And you just want to hold them and never let go but ypou can't because that's why you are there to say good bye. So you tell them goodbye and then you are off to laugh and tell stories about the loved one that had just passed. I believe that this is the usual process that comes with grief.

LOST!

Ok, I have been under some stress recently and I am a huge movie lover. I did not get the job in Jonesborough, TN. They probably went with someone a little closer to home, then my uncle BEBO died and Sara is going through alot of stress which stresses me out because I just want the best for her and for her to be happy. I am blogging to let you know about his show that I have been watching NON STOP on hulu.com. First, HULU.COM is amazing, and I love the show lost but it is so complicated sometimes, like what is up with this island. Is it magical, who are the others, and what is in that stupid hatch. The show follows like 16 different people at the same time, for the entire show and you are so distracted by the end you feel like you had a bad case of ADHD for 20 years. I def recommend the show to everyone that feels like they would like it, and I am continuing to BLOG this time B/C it makes me feel better, and I am asking for prayers for Sara and I. The funeral is Thursday and I am a pal, so it will be hard. Also, hard to say goodbye.

I LOVE YOU BEBO.

Bebo and Sara

So sorry I have not posted anything in so long, today my uncle bebo passed away, and I am tore up about it and I do not know what to do except be strong for my family and try to do what I can for them. The weird thing is I have not cried. I was so close to him and yet I have not shed one tear. I have heard that the job I perform can make you hard on the inside and I hope that it has not taken effect yet. And on the other hand I want to be with my fiance and hold her and just let her know that everything is going to be ok. It is hard being away from her, and sometimes it is hard to share my feelings with her but I try so hard to do it sometimes. So I am going to hang out with my friend Justin P. tonight and just try to get away for a few hours and try to get some normalcy (probably misspelled) back into my life for just a little while. I miss sara so much it hurts sometimes. I hope she understands, and I think she does that sometimes I am a mess.

I have missed posting so much because it allowed me to relieve so much on the inside without having to say anything. I have always loved writing and being funny and alot of my friends say that my blogs are hilarious but all they are to me are ramblings and randomness. Well I am going to get back to my family and Sara if you read this, I love you baby. My prayers are with you and so am I.

It's better to be better, than to be anything

Kidney stones......wow ya know until you have one, you really do not know how much pain you are missing out on. i mean it was just yesterday i had my first one, let me tell ya, it will stay in my jewlery box forever, never wanna flush that puppy. Well my friend Tim had his first one. It sucked for him too. I think about it for a second.................And i haven't heard any success stories with them. I will keep searching for them though. Have to be some good things about them out there, so that will be, TO BE CONTINUED.

ATTACK OF THE KIDNEY STONES........written and directed by TIM SPAIN! HA HA HA

okay that was add, now back to the blog.
It is three forty five in the morning, i am dog tired, watching the little mermaid cartoon, because why!, i am too tired and too much of a lazy ass zombie to wanna change it, so let me tell you guys what's going on. Pollution has entered the underwater kingdom of the mermaids. and instead of saying okay time to leave and go to the pacific ocean, they just sit there on there logs and say watch out sebastian. i do not get it. I mean are the people cracked out like OZZY when they write this stuff. what happened to the good stuff, like The Jetsons, and Flintstones, and O YEA South Park, and Adult Swim Shows like family guy. now peter griffin is one hella guy to take advice from, i mean he shows you what not to do, so there should be no room for error. And if you do the things he does then you should def. be cast for the sequel to napolean dynamite.

Card Game,
you know what burns my grits, you know what cooks my turkey sausage. Card games and loosing all the time. i hate it, it's like the luckiest game in the world and i can not win at it, the game is hand and foot and we play every week, but i have not won since we moved to a new building, i was unstoppable like freakin superman. but for some reason my luck changed with the winds, and my booty flew away into the nose bleed section. so if you know me, pray for me and my luck cause i really wanna win this week. Thanks.

I am gonna try to get some sleep, i will try to blog later and add some jokes, ha ha ha................i love you guys, but i am going away for a lil while for firework season. love you guys, bring me FOOD.

JH

Insomnia

Insomnia.............wow, it sucks. It's about 2 in the morning and I am wide awake watching a thigh master commercial, and guess what I want to buy it. Not because I have huge thighs but just because I want to buy it. No wonder they sell so much crap on T.V. your thoughts are lowered to the level of Ketchup. Thigh Master, that's ridiculous. And for some reason I want to buy a tax cut book, wowzers.......This is crazy. And Now I want to buy Roseta Stone and learn Sanscrit, that one is for Tim, anyway it is late and I am tired. I think I am going to talk about one new artist and then i shall leave in peace.

The Black Mourning, they are off of T-Rex records, ADAM DURITZ's label, and they are awesome, check them out. thank you for checking into my life. This is it. Love you guys, and GOD BLESS

P.S. it is saying i posted this at 11:50 something, and this autosave crap that is going on now Sucks. i think it is messing up the post times. well be safe and sure it's 2:24 and how come when you want to take a nap, like on a rainy afternoon or some lazy sunday, how come you can not go to bed. I mean it sucks, i am so tired, i feel as though it's finals week. it sucks, well wish me luck. I have a date with some sheep.

jh

Thank You For Not Smoking!

So this is my general thought, SMOKING KILLS! Smoking one cig. like takes a few seconds off your life, but i still enjoy that puff puff like my life depends on it. My friend Tim and Amy and Debra think I smoke too much. Now I know that they care about me and I know they want to make me healthy, so why do they not just ask me to quit eating red meat too.......it's unhealthy, or what about MSG in pork, no one is worried there. Also, you have your fats, trans fats, trans sat fats. The list can go on and on and on. What cigs cause cancer, bad foods cause obecity, Being Overweight is the main symptom for the major reason for death in this country. Cigs are an appetite suppressant. I am all for quiting, but it made me wonder, why preach on one if you don't think about the others? Here are some Cig. Facts.......

FACTS about SMOKING:

1. 1.2 billio people smoke world wide
2. <>
3. About 40 percent of America’s 50 million smokers will try to kick the habit at least once this year. Fewer than one in ten will succeed. — Center for Disease Control and Prevention
4. Pregnant women who smoke have higher rates of miscarriage, , premature birth, and complications of pregnancy. More of their babies soon after birth from crib than the newborns of nonsmoking mothers.
5. Road accidents, and drugs and solvents all . Smoking s five times more people before their time than all these other causes of put together. Smoking is the biggest single cause of preventable disease and premature in this country. — Smoking and Your Child, issued by Britain’s Department of Health

Now, what have we leared, anything? To be a valid argument, let me bring in the other factor, FOOD. Obesity Facts:

1. Obesity and overweight are linked to Type 2 diabetes, coronary heart disease, high blood pressure and some cancers.
2. People with Type 2 diabetes may develop kidney failure, loss of vision, high blood pressure, and hip and joint problems.
3. High body mass index contributed to 3,154 deaths and 37,373 years of life lost in 1997.
4. The number of adults who are overweight or obese has continued to increase. Currently, 64.5 percent of U.S. adults, age 20 years and older, are overweight and 30.5 percent are obese. Severe obesity prevalence is now 4.7 percent, up from 2.9 percent reported in the 1988 - 1994 National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES) by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

I will interrupt, for only a second. PREVENTABLE, so they are saying obesity is prevetable, but so is lung cancer, in most cases, but it's the second cause of death in the United States. What does that tell me? Tells me that eating till you are over weight, is just as dangerous as me lighting up a cig, in the parking lot. I am not raving because of my friends, I love them. Today I went to the grocery store and this Overweight guy asked me why I smoked, I said because I enjoy it. He said well you should stop. I knew the guy, he indulges himself even if he is not hungry. HE is 22, almost 300 lbs. He can not walk to the door without passing out. And he lectured me on smoking. I couldn't say anything, I was just shocked, I have heard of situations like this but never been aproached. How can a guy that is overweight and INACTIVE give me advice on unhealthy descisions. You make one every trip to the pantry. Don't give me that, I enforce a healthy lifestyle cause that is crap. I don't think he knows this blog address, I might give it to him so he can stumble upon it, and say o crap, he is talking about me. I know I have posted a million times today but this just happened to me so I thought I would tell you guys what went down. I may edit it later, so get back to it and see if i wrote more.

HUM BUG!

-jh-